falling in love

I’m not falling in love.

I fell in love with him before.

Somewhere in another life,

we began our journey.

Traveling many roads,

living different lives,

we lost our way.

He was always just a stone throw away

but I could never see him.

Around the corner,

down the street,

always near but never here.

And as I gave up,

he found me.

He saw through my silly disguise;

hidden under a big floppy hat;

he called to me and I knew him.

I knew his heart,

I felt his pain,

I loved his soul.

He found me.

I found him.

We found the love we lost.

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Untitled – goodbye

He drove me to the brink of insanity

I sat and just rode along.

When I got there he opened the door

and I stood on the edge.

He drove away

just like he said he would.

I stood on the edge

and felt the wind blow through my hair.

He called to me

and told me to jump.

I did.

Falling and falling

I thought it would never end.

And when I landed,

there was a splash

then I was drowning.

There he was again,

holding me under

unwilling to let me breath.

I was surrounded with darkness

and then I saw the light.

I laid still

as if I were dead.

He left me there

to die.

I didn’t.

He laughed

I cried

This was our goodbye…

to the pain

A toast, to the tears and heartache.

I wish you well on your journey to find someone else in pain.

My anguish is gone and not much remains.

The emptiness leaves me a new

To fill my heart with what is true.

Love that is pure and unconditional awaits.

The details are still up in the air.

The who, the what, the when, and the where.

But I will drink to the end of the nightmarish hell

Of lonely nights and empty days.

So raise your glass and toast with me

To living life as I was meant to be.

My Personal Obsession

Since I was a child I was a dreamer

I thought there was something wrong with me

I wasn’t into all the latest fads and trends, music, and video games

I read books and watched old movies, musicals

There were things I understood and just knew instinctively

Normal was not mine to attain

I looked different

I acted different

I lived different

There was nothing wrong with me on the outside sorta

Inside there was all kinds of crazy in my head

I thought too much

I lived too fast

I didn’t think enough

What lives in one’s head is not reality

There is emotion and memories and perception

I lived for love

I created a dream

I lived a lie

Now I live in reality and looking in from the outside

Living a nightmare

I am dreaming

I am singing and dancing

I am obsessed with love

Since I was a child I was a dreamer